People come up to me and say, 'Can I just thank you for writing my life?' And I reply, 'I'm glad someone else is as idiotic as I am.'

I'm thankful for the incredible advances in medicine that have taken place during my lifetime. I almost certainly wouldn't still be here if it weren't for them.

I'm thankful for my family's health, that everybody's healthy. That's something that can be taken for granted, so I'm grateful for that.

I started off at the Second City in Chicago... It's an improvisational theater that ostensibly does social and political satire, but when I was there, we generally didn't. We did character work, and we did just the silliest things we could think of. We weren't all that concerned with, you know, changing the world through mime.

I want to be more physical and theatrical within the stand-up. There might be dance moments, and people better watch out - I will gallop.

A good laugh heals a lot of hurts.

It is possible to suffer and despair an entire lifetime and still not give up the art of laughter.

Mother says she can never stay mad at Daddy no matter how hard she tries. And Daddy says, ' Stay mad! You won't even let me get mad at you,' and then they laugh. Aren't you sorry for people who don't laugh, Vicky? Yes. And people who don't love music and books. And people, John said.

Wherever there's laughter, there is heaven.

An infinite question is often destroyed by finite answers...To define everything is to annihilate much that gives us laughter and joy...If I try self consciously to become a person, I will never be one. The most real people, those who are able to forget their selfish selves, who have true compassion, are usually the most distinct individuals

I cannot find it in me to believe that God enjoys long faces and scowls at merriment.

Until bitterness ans self-pity and anger are gone... the belief was that healing was not possible until the spirit was cleansed.