My brother always teases me about my forehead: 'I could eat off it!'

Concerns buzzed like flies in her head, and she swatted them with prayers.

I'm from Texas, so we used to wear our pants starched down like a cowboy. So when I got to New York, to New Jersey, everybody was laughing at me like, 'Look at his pants! His pants could stand up by themselves!'

People come up to me and say, 'Can I just thank you for writing my life?' And I reply, 'I'm glad someone else is as idiotic as I am.'

Mother says she can never stay mad at Daddy no matter how hard she tries. And Daddy says, ' Stay mad! You won't even let me get mad at you,' and then they laugh. Aren't you sorry for people who don't laugh, Vicky? Yes. And people who don't love music and books. And people, John said.

Happiness and unhappiness are contagious.

Nothing else can quite substitute for a few well-chosen, well-timed, sincere words of praise.

His comedy pleases by the thoughts and the language, and his tragedy for the greater part by incident and action. His tragedy seems to be skill, his comedy to be instinct.

He ended, and his words impression leftOf much amazement to th' infernal crew,Distracted and surpris'd with deep dismayAt these sad tidings.Milton'sParadise Regained,b. i.3.

You are certainly one of the joys of life for all who have ever come within a mile of you.

I believe that worrying about a bad thing prepares you for it when it comes. If you worry, the bad thing doesn't hit you as hard. You can roll with the punch if you see it coming.

Humour is...the all-consoling and...the all-excusing, grace of life.