One thing I have learned during these past few terrible years is that our grief and sorrow should be shared, not carried alone.

So often I have felt alone in my journey, yet I've been afraid to let anyone see my fear and weakness.

Acceptance is like an antibiotic that prevents past rejections from turning into present-day infections. The need for belonging runs deep.

If they make the choice to walk over me rather than walk with me, I'll have to love them from afar.

We must respect ourselves enough to break the pattern of placing unrealistic expectations on others.

People don't mind doing CPR on a crisis victim, but no person is equipped to be the constant lifeline to another.

But weeping with them and rejoicing with them does not mean trying to take control of their out-of-control choices and behaviors. We can forgive them. But we cannot control them. And we should not enable them.

Why did this happen? Because there's someone else in the world who would drown in their own tears if not for seeing yours.

Our disappointments in ourselves—in our lives—aren't just isolated pieces of evidence that we fall short and life is hard. No, they are the exact places where we can break secrecy with fellow humans and show up to say, "Me too. I get it. I understand. You aren't alone. Together, we can find our way home.

We must respect ourselves enough to break the pattern of placing unrealistic expectations on others. After all, people will not respect us more than we respect ourselves. No, it's not wrong to need people. But some of our biggest disappointments in life are the result of expectations we have of others that they can't ever possibly meet.

You will hear human answers that try to tie bows around the big blows of life. These sound good in a sermon but never hold up in real life. And that's when you will see what a gift it is that you've been entrusted with enough hurt to keep you humane. You'll offer the only real answer available: 'The Lord helped me survive and He'll help you too. I'll hold your hand while you find your way to Him.

Perfection intimidates. Compassion inspires. And in that you will finally find the why. Why did this happen? Because there's someone else in the world who would drown in their own tears if not for seeing yours. And when you make one other human simply see they aren't alone, you make the world a better place.