You can't let your heart go bad like that, like sour milk. There's always the chance you'll want to use it later.

Most families would sooner forgive you for going to prison than for moving out of Lee County.

Look at the weaknesses of others with compassion, not accusation. It's not what they're not doing or should be doing that's the issue. The issue is your own chosen response to the situation and what you should be doing. If you start to think the problem is "out there," stop yourself. That thought is the problem.

I remember both of us becoming tearful on that day, not so much because of the insights, but because of the increased sense of reverence we had for each other. We discovered that even seemingly trivial things often have roots in deep emotional experiences. To deal only with the superficial trivia without seeing the deeper, more tender issues is to trample on the sacred ground of another's heart.

If I make deposits into an Emotional Bank Account with you through courtesy, kindness, honesty, and keeping my commitments to you, I build up a reserve. Your trust toward me becomes higher, and I can call upon that trust many times if I need to.

A person must possess himself and have a deep sense of security in fundamental principles and values in order to genuinely apologize.

Love is a value that is actualized through loving actions.

He continually made deposits into each of our 'emotional bank accounts' with one-on-one dates and modeled that 'in relationships

It is not what others do or even our own mistakes that hurt us the most; it is our response to those things.

When two people in a marriage are more concerned about getting the golden eggs, the benefits, than they are in preserving the relationship that makes them possible, they often become insensitive and inconsiderate, reflecting the little kindnesses and courtesies so important to a deep relationship. They begin to use control leavers to manipulate each other, to focus on their own needs, to justify their own position and look for evidence to show the wrongness of the other person

It takes a great deal of character strength to apologize quickly out of one's heart rather than out of pity. A person must possess himself and have a deep sense of security in fundamental principles and values in order to genuinely apologize.

Look at the weaknesses of others with compassion, not accusation. It's not what they're not doing or should be doing that's the issue. The issue is your own chosen response to the situation and what you should be doing. If you start to think the problem is out there, stop yourself. That thought is the problem.