Quotes from Tucker Max
A personal brand is relevant to people who sell or create something relevant to who they are as a person. If you're not in that boat, which most people are not, personal branding makes no sense.
— Tucker Max
The positive side of willpower is the power to do and to frame all of your I won'ts as being in the service of those higher I wills. Once you do that, you're no longer using your willpower to oppress and disappoint half of yourself. You're using it to create the future self that you really care about. Thus, willpower is really just being as kind as you can to the man you want to become.
— Tucker Max
When your buddy tells you a movie is good, that's worth 2,000 commercials.
— Tucker Max
SlingBlade: "If you EVER speak ill of the McGriddle again I will personally force-feed you one while I fuck you in the butt using the wrapper as a condom and then donkey punch you when the infused syrup nuggets explode in your mouth.
— Tucker Max
Make no mistake about it: Law school is not a bastion of intellectual discourse.
— Tucker Max
No one has probably helped me more with my narcissism than my dog.
— Tucker Max
Here's to the women we've met, and to the women we've fucked, And to those amongst us who've had no such luck. Here's to beer in the glass, and vodka in the cup, Here's to pokin' her in the ass, so she won't get knocked up. Here's to all of you, and here's to me, Together as friends we'll always be, But if we should ever disagree, Then FUCK ALL OF YOU, HERE'S TO ME!
— Tucker Max
I wish I could bottle the seductive look she gave me so I could sniff it when I jack off.
— Tucker Max
I never understand why women think drama and bullshit are attractive to guys. They're not. I'm going to be real clear about this, ladies, so pay attention: Prince Charming doesn't come to rescue cunty lunatics.
— Tucker Max
Obviously, I love Japanese food. My favorite TV show of all time, without exception, is 'Iron Chef.' Not the stupid American version; 'Iron Chef' Japanese; the real one, the one that was on in Japan... my DVR for years was set to record almost every single 'Iron Chef' episode.
— Tucker Max
This may come as a shock to some of you, but I have a slightly volatile personality. I don't suffer fools well.
— Tucker Max
It is hard for me to be vulnerable, because I never learned how to do that. I was never vulnerable in a safe way.
— Tucker Max